Our love - Looking back....

I don't when I grew up, but it feels like just yesterday that me and my husband had just started dating.  We would go to the beach a lot, and I remember sitting there in our sweat shirts and jeans watching the sun set, and he told me that he was falling in love with me.  That was probably date 4 or 5. We knew that we were going to get married right away. I remember feeling like we were the luckiest people in the world because we found each other.

He proposed on our one year anniversary... in the rain... with his knee in a puddle... and I was completely surprised! And then we whirl-winded through until now.  We started dating in '06, got engaged in '07, married in '08, bought a house in '09 (and got pregnant but didn't know until '10), Adelaide was born in '10, got pregnant again in '11, and Jackson was born in '12.

We still sit down after the babies are in bed and look at each other and say "I can't believe that we have kids and we are married!!" It all goes by so fast! I wish that I could just go back in time and savor every little moment even more.
I can still remember every feeling I had the first time I met my husband. Thinking to myself "God, why didn't you put me with someone like him?" I had never felt that way about anyone! I remember our one bedroom apartment in Riverside CA. It was my favorite place in the world! I still miss it to this day and I'm not sure why; maybe because it was our first home.
I was thinking about all of this because I was listening to our song. The song we danced to at our wedding. What an amazing thing that just from listening to it I am taken back to our wedding day. I heard one of my best friend's wedding song yesterday and she was the first one of our friends to get married and remember watching them dance and thinking how lucky they were that they found each other and get to spend their lives together.
I know that marriage isn't always a cake walk, and for some it is even more difficult than we can imagine. But remembering how it all got started, and knowing that God has a plan for you to love each other even more than the day you were married, makes me so excited for what is to come.

Do you want to hear our wedding song?
Here it is:
Tyrone Wells - Sea Breeze

"You're gonna have to do this standing up!"

The arrival of Jackson Dane Nelson was already exactly 5 weeks ago!

I feel like he was born yesterday (but then again, I feel like Addy was born yesterday too.)

I am going to have to jump between memories of my labor and delivery with Adelaide and Jackson because they were so different that I can't tell Jackson's story without letting you know about my experience before his.

It was the morning of June 13th, a Wednesday, and I was up early like every morning for about a month because I was so uncomfortable sleeping.  We had a midwife appointment scheduled for that morning (I don't remember the time) but I know I was hoping that he would have been born before that appointment. My due date was the 11th and with Addy I was 5 days early. I also had strong, painful contractions with Addy for about 3 weeks prior to delivering where as this time I didn't have any leading up to labor. So when contractions started I wasn't sure if it was labor or if it was beginning the weeks of contractions.

So I called the midwives and they decided to come to us that morning. 

Butch (my husband) stayed home from work, and we all were just hanging out, watching movies and talking.  I remember laughing because Addy was going through a Winnie the Pooh phase and one of my midwives is named Robin and she kept caller her Christopher Robin! It was very cute!  While my contractions were extremely painful, in between it felt like I wasn't in labor at all.  It was very different to me and I kept thinking that I was overreacting and it wasn't real labor.

It was when we were all watching the movie Tangled in the living room and I was on my own couch having really, really painful contractions and almost sleeping between them, that I started thinking "Oh my, this is much more painful than I remembered it! I don't know if I can really do this again!"  Well shortly after, my contractions started to spread out and I asked if I should walk around because I thought that labor may have stopped.  So I walked around our island in the kitchen and got through my contractions either leaning on the island or on Butch.  I remember UPS made a delivery as well as the regular mail and I wanted to open the packages because if they were gifts for Jackson I though that would get me excited and get my mind off of labor.  Sure enough there was a bear from my aunt Jackie that she had made for Jackson.  That was really cool!

Well shortly after, one of my midwives mentioned that if I planned on having Jackson upstairs then we should head up because the room was all ready.  I was feeling really good in between contractions so I was shocked that it could possibly be getting close.  Also, my water still hadn't broken! With Addy I knew I was in labor because I woke up in the middle of the night when my water broke.

I started pushing a little with some contractions and it helped a little with the pain but I didn't feel like they were doing anything.  I had to go pee a few times and each time before I walked into the bathroom I would say something like "I'll be out in a minute... famous last words ha?!" Basically always joking that because I had a fear of having him in the bathroom that it was just going to happen in there. Then I mentioned that I had to go pee so my midwife suggested I wait for a contraction while on the toilet and try and get my water to break since I'll be sitting up and it would be easier.  Sure enough, I waited for a contraction and BOOM! My water exploded in the toilet! We were all kind of laughing! I was still in the bathroom by myself and could hear my husband and the midwives just talking casually and chit-chatting and I yelled out that I was going to wait for one more contraction so that I could try and push him down lower. 

Well that contraction came and I felt him move down... but it didn't stop.  I felt his head start to come out.  The contraction was so strong and wouldn't let up so I had to keep on pushing! I yelled "I think he's coming!!" The midwives ran in (there were 2 midwives and an intern) and Robin yells "Butch, you're gonna want to come in here, she's gonna have the baby in here!"

They asked if I could move back to the bedroom and I could barely stop pushing to answer No.  So they said I was going to have to do this standing up!

STANDING UP?!!! Are you kidding me?! My midwife, Connie, was holding me up under my left arm and there was no room for Butch in the bathroom so he jumped up on the counter and held me up from my right arm (I didn't know he was on the counter until talking after).

I just remember thinking with each push that if I was able to take a breath I would be bawling my eyes out saying that I couldn't do it anymore! I needed to take a break but that contraction just kept on coming. My legs were shaking uncontrollably and I wanted so badly to give up, but I kept thinking about how I was going to meet Jackson any second, and I just kept pushing and pushing.

So Jackson was born right there in the bathroom, with me standing up, and in one HUGE and PAINFUL contraction.

As soon as he came I sat back on the toilet and held him in my arms in absolute amazement.  Just an hour ago I was questioning whether or not I was really in labor and now I was holding this beautiful little baby in my arms. It was so amazing!

Right after I was telling Butch that we would have to adopt the rest because that was traumatizing and so much more painful than I ever remembered it being.  Then a few hours passed and I was in tears telling him that I couldn't wait to have more!

I felt so much love for this new little baby boy and couldn't believe that life could be so good and God would choose to bless me so much!

Labor ended up being 6 1/2 hours long which wasn't bad at all, it really flew by! I would do it all again in a heart beat!  Jackson is such a blessing! I love every little thing about him! He makes me feel like a new mom all over again! I love him with all of my heart and I am so thankful for this family that I have!

Butch's grandma (Adelaide and Jackson's great grandma) was holding him saying that she remembers holding her grandkids in her arms the same way as if it were yesterday.  She was saying how fast it all goes by, and I try to keep that in my mind and in my heart when I'm spending each day with these babies of mine.  I already feel like Addy is growing up SOOOO fast and to think that one day they will both find their spouses and get married and leave our home... oh it definitely brings me to tears!

These days, these moments of changing diapers, these hugs and kisses, these baby smells... will be forever savored in my memory! 

Birth Story GIVEAWAY! (And my last birth story)

Since I'm in the last clump of weeks before baby Jackson is here I am finding myself wanting to read birth stories every chance I get. So I thought, how fun would it be to here all of your birth stories! To entice you to share, I will be giving away an outfit and matching headband of My choice from my new summer line to one lucky person!! (Photos only show part of the summer line)

Just comment here under my blog post and share your whole wonderful, tearful, terrifying, or even funny birth story. If you've adopted, I want to hear the story of the birth of your family! The whole process, all your feelings and thoughts along the way, and any fun details. *Entry instructions are below*

I know I will have a brand new story to share very soon, but here is my birth story with Adelaide:
WARNING: this is very detailed content!

I had been having very strong Braxton Hicks contractions for about 2 and a half weeks, which really made me nervous for the upcoming birth because I was planning on having an all-natural home birth... no drugs! I remember saying that if it hurt this bad so early on then I can't imagine how badly the "real" contractions were going to hurt!

At this time, I was going to a women's bible study on Thursday mornings and we would have lunch afterwards with my mother-in-law and some friends. The night before I had gone to the bathroom and there it was, my mucus plug. I was super excited because I knew that meant that the baby wouldn't be too far off, but I also knew that it could be weeks before she got here too.  So I went to bible study on Thursday morning and my contractions were just as strong and painful as they had been for the last couple of weeks. They had been steadily getting stronger each day so I really didn't worry.

At lunch that day, I ordered French Onion Soup and a BLT with avocado sandwich.  My contractions were actually making me hunch forward and were making it more difficult to talk through them, but again, I didn't think anything of it because I thought they were just progressing as they had been for days.

It was a normal night and my husband had a long day of work and we were both really, really tired. I woke up (for probably the 6th time that night) to go pee and went back to bed. Then a few minutes later I was thinking that I must have had more pee in my bladder because I was leaking. So I went to the bathroom again and wondered how I had so much pee again, but didn't think much past that. Then about a minute later I thought I peed again so I went to the bathroom and again had a lot of pee come out.
Not getting the picture, this happened about 3 more times in the next 10 or 15 minutes. Then I remember sitting on the toilet and yelling to my husband "I think my water might be breaking!"

His response was "stand in the bathtub!" (I told him this just a few months ago and he didn't know that he ever said that... I guess he had it prepared to say even in his sleep!)

So, thinking that was weird but doing it anyway, I stood in the bathtub and more came out, then more again and again and it wasn't looking like pee. So I yelled "Yep, this is it my water is breaking!" That was at 2am.

So my husband jumped up and grabbed his watch and we started to time the contractions. Here's where we got confused... they were come anywhere from 1 minute to 6 minutes apart and some would last 20 seconds and some 1.5 minutes.  So we both agreed that they were too irregular and I couldn't be in "real labor" just yet.

We called our midwife and she said to call her when my contractions were lasting about a minute and 3-5 minutes apart. So I told my husband to go back to bed and I would go downstairs and watch movies and try to relax.

I watched TV for a while and then put on Mr. Magorium's Wonder Imporium. I don't remember being able to watch any of it because I was in pain but I waited until it was almost over and I called my husband from my cell to his and told him to come downstairs because I was REALLY in labor! This was at 6am.

I also texted my whole family (who are all in California) and told them that I was in labor so that they could start heading out to Arizona, and they all pretty much left right away.

I remember hearing so many stories of how relaxing and comfortable a home birth is because you can watch movies, and eat whatever you want, and walk around your own home feeling relaxed... and so I was thinking that it wouldn't be until the middle of the next night that she would arrive. But it all happened so much faster than I thought it would!

The first of 2 of our midwives got here at about 9:30am and she watched me for a while and talked to my husband and took a bunch of notes, then started preparing our room for the birth.

She asked me at one point how I was feeling I said, in between contractions, "I think I'm doing ok, but if it get's any worse I just don't know if I can do it." Again, I was thinking I had about 20 more hours of this!

She replied "Well I don't think it's going to get any worse than this, just maybe a little closer together."

That gave me SO much hope! Then she checked me about a half an hour later for the first time and I was 8cm dialated. It felt like it was 20 minutes after that (it was really a little bit longer) that she said that if I feel like I need to push then I can start to push with my contractions.  I was shocked! I didn't realize I had even gone through transition yet!! This gave me so much encouragement! But I said that I did not in any way feel ready to push.

So she stepped out of the room for a minute and I was laboring on my hands and knees by my bed when I said "Oh no, I think I need to push!"
My husband, who is extremely weary around female blood started yelling for our midwife "Robin! Robin! She's pushing! She's pushing!!"
I asked him to tell me what time it was thinking it had to be almost night time again, and he said it was 11am. What?! It was going by soo fast!!
So she came back in and I got into place on the bed and started the beginning of 2 hours of pushing.  It wasn't really that bad pain-wise but I kept feeling like every time I pushed the whole room turned dark and hot and I was going to pass out. It made me feel sick to my stomache each time I pushed.  So when I finally felt the head making it's way out, yes it was painful, but it was such a relief to know that something was actually coming from my pushing.  (I found out after that the whole first hour I wasn't really pushing how I should have and so those were more like "practice pushes".)
I stayed, surprisingly, level-headed the whole time. I never really lost my composure. In fact, while I was in the midst of pushing her head out I peed and I yelled to the midwives while pushing "I'm peeing!" and they said "okay just don't talk, keep pushing!" I thought that was funny afterwards.
I also never lost my sense of modesty. Apparently, once you get close to transition most women have lost all sense of modesty but when I had to get checked to see how far I was dialated I asked "do I need to take off my underwear?" Duh!

Anyways, at 1pm, after 11 hours of labor, Adelaide was born! She weighed 7lbs 10oz and was 19" long.  They put her straight on my stomach and it was such a surreal feeling! I felt like I could run a marathon, I was so full of excitement and energy! And a plus.. no ripping or tearing!

There was a lot of blood and a lot of pain! And the recovery wasn't a blast, but Addy made it all completely worth it! I would have done it again right away if it meant getting another little baby girl!

If someone had told me then that every single day I would love this little girl more and more, I never would have believed it. My husband was glowing!! Our family had a new, perfect little person to love and we cherished every single second of it!

To this day I don't know why God chose to bless us with such an amazing little girl that day, but I am so grateful for it! I can't wait to meet Jackson and see what amazing things God will do with our family once he is here!



GIVEAWAY ENTRY INSTRUCTIONS:
Share this blog post to your FB page so all of your mommy friends can participate too, then comment below with your story! (It doesn't have to be as long as mine was but feel free to share it all!)
Entries end on Thursday 5/17 and a winner will be selected on Friday the 18th. Have fun with it!!

This Summer...

I am still SO not prepared for little Jackson's arrival! I have fabric coming in the mail for his bedding and all of his clothes are in bags still. Last week we got our Supplies Checklist from our midwives (yes I'm having a home birth like I did with Adelaide) and I can't believe we are so close already!
My plans for getting ready have been playing in my head over and over, and unfortunately until I know the exact day that he is coming I can't do much more planning. I know that very soon I will be putting my shop on "Vacation Mode" for one week and we will pre-make as many items as we can from my summer line and when the shop comes off of "Vacation Mode" everything will be ready-to-ship only. This is the only way that I can think of to keep the business running while I'm out of commission for a bit.
Karen has agreed to start taking pre-cut dresses home starting this week and doing extra after work and on weekends to help us tackle our current orders and I'm so grateful for that! I don't know what I would do without her!
I'm hoping that when I come back from Maternity leave ( I know, I still call it leave when my business is just downstairs) we can possibly keep the shop running as ready-to-ship only and see how that works out. I really, really want to start spending more time blogging, answering customer questions, and of course, browsing the internet for fun new fabrics! Since I still have no plans for a boys' clothing line I am hoping to do some much needed crafting and posting those to my blog as well as... yes, the long awaited patterns for sale! I hope to do some fun free tutorials as well.

My friend came over the other day and we made some headbands for our daughters and I had so much fun making something new! I'll be doing a tutorial of these for sure! I also want to make a sensory book for Jackson, some cute plush toys, and I've had an idea for a decoration in his room that would make a great how-to but I won't say what it is yet because it could turn out way different than what I'm imagining.
As for my husband, he has been helping a lot where he can when it comes to top-stitching sashes or making the flowers for the sashes or just watching Addy so I can get work done. He just got a job as a youth pastor at our church which is so exciting but I'm already missing him being home with me and doing his surprise clean-ups around the house, or fun day-dates with me and Addy. I know it is all for the better though. God definitely has a great plan in store for us and no matter what it is I am so willing to follow! He has never led us down a path that ended up nowhere.
Now our next step is praying for a bigger house in our very much-loved neighborhood that we can grow the business and our family in. We have a great home now and at one point it was our dream home, but we are hoping for a different flow that can accommodate more wonderful friends working here out of our home to help the business grow and help me get some more family time.
Well I am really going to try not to wait so long for the next blog so I will try and set aside some time for either a how-to craft or get some patterns done and out there.
Until then, I will keep all of you in my prayers! Love ya!  --- Heidi

Getting Ready for Another Little One

So there are about 78 days until this little baby boy that's growing inside of me is due to arrive. We have just about nothing ready for him. His room is still the guest room, we've recently purchased one boy's outfit from Target, and today we decided that his name will be Jackson. I can't be more excited to meet him. I wonder if this baby will look like me because Addy is the spitting image of her dad and I'm not really even sure we're related! I can picture him having brown eyes and light brown hair, which is half way to looking like me :)

I still have a huge list of things to do to get ready for his arrival! I know if I could spend a little more time on Pinterest then maybe I'll get more inspired.
I want to get his room started but have no clue where to begin! I'm thinking something earthy for the decor. My husband really wants to do a Where the Wild Things Are theme, and since I paint (or at least used to) and painted a mural in our daughter's room, he wants me to paint one in Jackson's room too. That doesn't interest me at all right now.
I'm not sure what the second pregnancy is supposed to be like, but I feel a little bit guilty that I haven't put a lot of thought into his arrival until just recently. If it wasn't for my incredibly large stomache and the fact that I can't drink caffeine, then I'm pretty sure I would have forgotten I was pregnant for the most part. Is that normal? But now I'm the opposite! I am beginning to worry. I want to meet him so badly that I can't help but think those horrible thoughts of "what if?"
Not a day goes by where I don't thank God for my precious daughter Adelaide. I know that life would be incredibly different without her. I know that as soon as I hold Jackson in my arms I will feel the same way with him too.
I was listening to the radio 2 days ago and they played a clip of Steven Curtis Chapman talking about losing his daughter. He said that he went through a realization that this is not our home and he will get to see his little girl again. And he said that he missed her so much and couldn't wait to meet her in heaven.
I've heard the story a lot, and yet when he said how much he missed her I just started to cry. I couldn't imagine not being able to see Addy again, or hold her, or watch her sleep, or hear her voice, or her funny laugh. I don't ever, ever want to think about that, but as a mother I guess it's part of the package. The worry and the fear comes naturally. And I know that it's our job to look towards God and know that He is in control.
Last week at church, the pastor talked a lot about how God instructs us to not be afraid.

^{Hebrews 12:}

⁵ Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,

   “Never will I leave you;
   never will I forsake you.”^[a]

 ⁶ So we say with confidence,

   “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.    What can mere mortals do to me?”

I've realized that there are a lot of things that come naturally to us, like worrying, sin, selfishness, etc... and that's why there is so much in the bible to help us overcome those feelings and to be able to live the life that we are meant to live. I figure why would we be encouraged to only love those that love us when that comes naturally, we are encouraged to do what comes unnaturally. To love our enemies.

So I guess the same goes for moms and their kids. Why would God tell us, so often in the bible not to worry or have fear? Because He knows that it is a natural instinct that we have inside of us. It is something that we will all do at some point in our lives, and He wants to give us hope. 

I've read about Michelle Duggar's pregnancy that was lost. It was a little girl. I just can't help but let my heart break. Because, although I haven't experienced it, I know as a mother that there is a pain that inside of her that can't be explained.

This life is so incredibly short, and one day when I'm standing with God, I will see that there is a bigger and better place than I could ever have imagined! 

So aside from the worry, I am filled with excitement. I have so much joy and feel the love of the Lord. I know that I have already been blessed with so, so much more than I ever deserve and instead of wondering "why?" I am going to look to God for the next steps. I will continue to follow His lead and know that I don't have to fear because He is in control and not me. I can't wait to meet little Jackson and hear his cry. I wonder if he will be as active as he is in my belly? (Which is WAY more active than Addy ever was!) But until I meet him, I will patiently wait and do my best to prepare his home.

An Exciting New Addition to Adelaide's Boutique!

I am proud to announce that Adelaide's Boutique has a new addition! We welcomed Karen to our team this week and she has been such a blessing!

What this means for Adelaide's Boutique:

No more 'Vacation mode' on my website!: Normally, as soon as the orders start to fill up I put my shop on 'vacation mode' in order to catch up. This closes down my shop to any incoming orders and really slows things down. My goal is to no longer have this!

Faster Turn Over Times: I am really hoping to get out of this 3 week turn around phase and get orders out in at least 2 weeks.

New Releases on a weekly basis: My husband, who is the paperwork and business part of this boutique, has been using his marketing, retail, and clothing buyer experience to come up with some fun weekly releases that fans can look forward to and count on.

Future Growth: Adelaide's Boutique will now be a growing business with the hopes of future additions to our team. We hope to do some traveling for summer trade shows as well as growing the online business.

June will still hold the release of selling patterns in a new shop!

We can't wait to see where God leads us this year with so much fun going on! (Mainly, we can't wait to meet our little baby boy in June!!)
We will announce upcoming events on the Facebook fan page so stay posted! We love you guys!!

In the works...

I am currently working on putting all of my dresses into pattern-form. I will be opening another shop on Etsy soon where I will sell all of my patterns and include helpful tips and time-saving techniques that I've developed and found successful. This is going to be a big challenge for me, not only putting down on paper each and every dress style in each and every size but then to type step-by-step instructions for each one is something I'm not exactly looking forward to.
If you're wondering "why?" then, it's because once I'm done putting in all of the set-up time, I will be able to sell the patterns and have more time to spend with Addy and her new little brother. Since I'm due in June I think that's a good goal date to have it all done. The fun side of it for me will be creating new items! I LOVE making a new dress but don't always love making it over and over and over again.
When I was cleaning out my sewing room today I was thinking about what kind of patterns I could make that would be something completely new that I haven't seen yet and my brain just wouldn't stop. So I made a first trial and error (more error than trial) dress and gave up.  Then when I was feeding Addy breakfast I decided to roll her high chair into my sewing room and give it another try. I came up with my new all-time favorite dress design! As soon as I was done I took Addy out to the front yard and snapped some quick photos, edited them and uploaded them. And then came lunch... I did the same thing and started another dress of the same style to see if I really had it down and YES it is still my favorite! (I tend to think that every new dress is my new favorite).

So... if you are experienced at sewing or would like to learn how to from scratch then pull out your sewing machine, or do what I did and call your mom to borrow her 50 year old sewing machine, pick out some of your favorite fabrics at Joann, Hobby Lobby, or Fabric.com, and get ready to sew some super cute clothes!
I'm hoping to have at least 20 patterns in my shop before it is opened so that you have a variety to choose from.  The sizes will range from 6 months to 6 years.
My husband laughs when I tell him that I've been looking at some other dresses on Etsy and the creators have some really cute dresses but I know they are doing it the hard way and I just want to send them a message and throw out a helpful hint! But who am I to say that my way is better? I am definitely no pro! I just research like a crazy person to see if there are better ways to get the same result without sacrificing quality.
I hope that I don't kill myself in taking on this task but I know it will be worth it in the end. I can finally share all of my secrets with everyone and still make money! There are no plans to close Adelaide's Boutique so don't worry about that.
**On a side note, please pray for my mom who taken to the hospital last night after something that looked like a seizure caused something that looks like an aneurysm. I know it's vague but they are running tests today and I haven't heard anything new as to what it all really was. I don't live in CA anymore so my sisters are there with her and I really wish I could be too. If we find out anything bad I will be headed out there.  Thank you!