Friday, July 15, 2011

My Mommy Life...

I really hope that I am not missing the mark with what I am supposed to be doing each day.  I definitely find myself having 'guilty mom syndrome' quite often, wondering if I'm not playing with Addy enough, or reading to her enough, or showing her enough love... and yet the days that I do, I just think that I'm a bad mom for spoiling her!  I know that God has a plan laid out for my life and I really, really want to follow that plan!  I pray every day for guidance and encouragement and wisdom, but I think I'm so busy talking sometimes that I don't give enough time to "listening"!  I know that there are clear signs right in front of my face sometimes and instead of seeing them I just see my own ambitions and wants and tend to take things into my own hands.  My understanding of what a "good mom" is is nothing short of perfection.  I know in my heart that it's not true, but I still strive for this goal of being a perfect mom - which I know the goal isn't bad, it's good - but when I don't measure up I feel like I've failed.  Is there a mom out there who doesn't feel like this or is it all part of the job?
I really love any and all encouragement from other moms and, of course, reading the bible and what God's view of a mom should be is such an encouragement.  I'm going to continue to strive for this goal but I hope and pray that my heart will listen to God and not Heidi when it comes to making decisions. 
I LOVE being a mom so much more than I ever thought a person could love something, but whoever said that being a mom is the best and the Hardest job ever is sooo right!! It comes with some inevitables like lack of sleep, tiredness, being awake too long.... are these the same things??  But when I see that cute little face, I just think "ahh, I can't wait to have more!"
(*Keep reading those Proverbs!! 13 was a really good one! I'll try to catch up on blogs soon.)

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